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Trying To Get Pregnant

I was diagnosed with endometriosis in my early twenties. I was told if I ever wanted to have kids to start as soon as possible. Being single at the time I thought it was never going to happen for me.

Flash forward 10 years I met my now husband. We talked about my struggles with endometriosis and my massive dream to to be a mother. He told me he would love nothing more than to make it come true.

My husband are trying to have children and have been for years. It’s been a very discouraging road. We can’t afford treatments or anything at the moment. With our ages it feels like it might never happen for us.

I’ve dreamed of nothing more as a little girl and now adult than to be a wife and mother. My husband and I discussed adoption if it comes to that point. However, as selfish as it sounds I want the joy of being able to bring my own child into the world. I want to be able to do the one thing as a woman I should be able to do. I want to be able to give my husband a child.

It takes every ounce of my energy to stay positive and hopeful. If any of you have any advice on things to try to help not only get pregnant, but also to help with the depression of it. I would love to hear from you. I truly appreciate having a place to come to for encouragement and everything.

  1. First, let me say I am so sorry you were pressured into trying to conceive on a timeline. I am not someone who has ever pursued pregnancy, but I can imagine it is uniquely painful to want to conceive and have such a struggle trying to do so.

    I hope others in the community weigh in here, but in the meantime, here's a link to our information on infertility, which may be a good place to start.

    ~Katrina, Advocate

    1. Thank you so much!

      1. You're welcome! Please reach out to us with further questions or for support! ~Katrina, Advocate

    2. thank you for reaching out and sharing your story. I'm sorry to hear that it's been one of much struggle and heartache. I can relate in that I was diagnosed with endometriosis in my early 30s and didn't get married until 40. I went in with a similar mindset - I have a desire on my heart to be a mother and I'm fully open to any way to make that happen. I wanted to try biologically first but if that wasn't in the plans, I would become a mother through adoption. I do feel fortune that I was able to get fertility treatments and had a baby at 42, but I know that's not everyone's story. I would say one of the things that helped me so much through our fertility journey was leaning on my faith. I don't know if that's something that is helpful for you but it was helpful to have comfort from something bigger than me. I also leaned on two friends who had been through similar journeys. One got pregnant and the other did foster-to-adopt, but it was having the comfort of talking to someone who can relate. (Another friend of mine recently changed jobs so she could get the coverage for fertility treatments, i know it's a bold and big move, but I was surprised because I don't know that I would have even thought of that as an option.)

      I hope you're finding some of that support and comfort here. I also journaled a lot and did my best to have open and honest conversations with my husband about how I was feeling. It was helpful in reminding me that, there were certain things I could do to support my health but this was something that was not fully in my control. He was saying it in a way to help take the pressure off me as if I was doing something "wrong."

      I wish I had the words to ease your emotions and comfort your heart, but I hope you know that you're not alone in this and we're so glad that you've shared your story here. <3

      1. thank you so much for this! It truly means a lot to hear from someone going and went through things I’m going through. It has been tough and I’ve been leaning on my faith. I didn’t know some instances cover fertility treatments. I have duel insurance through my work and my husband’s work. That might be something I need to look into and see if ours covers anything.

      2. I'm so glad to hear that it was helpful. I agree, it's always nice to connect with someone else who has been on a similar journey. Yes, I would definitely reach out to your insurance company. You may find that some medications or even treatments are partially or fully covered. It can even be good to connect with a fertility practice that you would consider going to because they may have self-pay payment plans. That can at least give you numbers to start budgeting. Even if it takes awhile, it can still feel good to have something to work towards. Wishing you much support and comfort.

    3. I just had to chime in and say, I am SO sorry you have had to go through this. I have had numerous doctors pressure me into having kids as well, and still do.

      I hate the struggle you and your husband are going through, and it makes me so sad and frustrated how expensive it is to get that help for treatments.

      I do want to say this one thing though, I know so many endometriosis warriors, who, have struggled, couldn't get the treatments, wanted to give up - but did end up still having their miracle. I know everyone is different and I know just reading that doesn't help. But I want you to know it is possible. Don't give up that hope <3

      And honestly for me, going to therapy has helped a lot with my depression over all of this. Again, it doesn't necessarily make everything better, but it helps me approach everything differently and have a different reaction/attitude (for the most part).

      I also hope you know; you can always talk with us whenever you need to. We are here for you <3 I am sending you so many big hugs and good thoughts your way. -Kimberli (advocate)

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