I’m Engaged! And Now the Baby Questions Begin…

My fiancé recently brought me back to the restaurant in Philadelphia where we had our first date. Except, instead of it being our first date as an official couple, this time, it became our first date as a newly engaged couple.

He popped the question, I said YES, and the champagne popped!

And the questions begin...

Since getting engaged, the most common question we receive is, “Have you set a date for the wedding?”. I expected a lot of the wedding questions. I asked a lot of them to all of my friends who have gotten engaged over the years.

What I didn’t expect are the questions or comments about babies! I know our family and friends are expressing excitement for all that is to come – especially knowing that I’ve waited a long time for this moment.

I’ll be 40 by the time I walk down the aisle and start trying for a baby. It’s exciting, but with a history of endometriosis, it’s also nerve-wrecking and stressful. I already eat super healthy, exercise regularly, have a strong faith and prayer life, and use essential oils daily. So, my natural lifestyle is supportive for fertility, but it still feels like a lot of "what-ifs".

Not a time to worry

What I have to realize is that we are not starting to try to have a baby until after our wedding, so worrying about it now is not only useless, but it distracts me from the joy of being engaged and planning our wedding.

So, knowing this next year will be busy with wedding planning (on top of my already busy schedule of being an entrepreneur), my main focus is to prioritize stress management and emotional support.

Planning ahead

I’ve ordered two fertility books – Making Babies and Yes, You Can Get Pregnant – from Amazon and beyond that, I’m choosing not to become consumed by it. Overthinking something that is not even something I can control in the moment will increase stress... the opposite of what I want and need.

Stress management

When I think of stress management, the weekly massages are nice and welcomed at any time. However, I know what I really need are techniques that I can practice throughout my day.

I need stress management techniques like...

• Diffusing essential oils throughout my home.
• Eating all my meals seated at a table and properly chewing my food.
• Reading a book at the end of the night instead of watching intense TV shows.
• Stopping for brief mindful breaths throughout the day. (I like the idea of doing this while I’m in the car so it’s not adding something to my to-do list, it’s simply changing “how” I’m doing an already existing activity.

Ultimately, I put my health and my entire future into my faith, and beyond that, I do my very best every day and trust the plan that God has for me.