Defeat

By Gabs

Last Updated:

1 min read

I am miserable. I got diagnosed with Endo in 2019. I will be having my third surgery for it on May 10. I just want this to help. I am done mentally and physically. I'm so depressed. My life is so difficult to manage anymore. I want to give up. I don't know how much more I can take. I don't want my life like this.
P.s. I am in LOVE with the sweatshirt from the raffle!

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Keri Wiginton Member

I am so sorry to hear you're going through all this. Sometimes I think the mental health aspect is harder to handle than the physical pain. I'm here to let you know that you're not alone. I've dealt with depression since my teen years — I'm 40 now — and people with chronic illnesses are much more likely to be diagnosed with mental health issues than the general public. I find that the worst part of depression is that it makes you feel like you'll never feel better, which makes it really hard to handle all the other stress endo throws our way! You may not be looking for tips on how to manage your mental health, but just in case you are, I'll leave some articles from our community. And please reach out if you ever need to chat or want other support, even if it's just to vent your frustrations. We're here for you! - Keri (endometriosis.net team member) https://endometriosis.net/living/managing-mental-health https://endometriosis.net/living/mental-health https://endometriosis.net/clinical/depression
Kimberli Davino Member

<inline-mention username="Gabs" user-id="4590574"/> oh warrior, so sorry you are going through all of this and feeling this way. Myself and, I am sure so many here, can relate. Please know you are not alone, and you don't have to go through this alone. I had my third surgery a few months ago, so I totally understand how you are feeling. It takes a toll. Especially when you aren't finding much relief. I have been in and out of depression due to it. Thoughts of wanting to give up. And then I remember to keep going. But then a hard day makes me want to give up again. It is an everyday battle for sure. And one I know I wouldn't be able to do without this community. I know I can't take your pain away and relieve you from your symptoms, but I do hope you know, we are here for you always. Anytime you need to reach out and chat or vent and cry, we are here. Keri left some great links to read. Definitely check them out if you want. Sending big hugs and good thoughts your way. Hoping this surgery is just what you need to find relief. Please keep us posted if you can. And keep on going. YOU absolutely got this. <3 Ps. so happy you love the sweatshirt! Hugs! -Kimberli (team member)
whatwouldleiado Member

I'm so sorry. Reading your post hurts my heart because it's so familiar with myself and for many, if not all, of our Endo Sisters. Chronic debilitating pains for day after day, year after year, over and over again can break you and wreak havoc on your mental health. I'm thankful that you've found this site and this community because there are so many of us here who are right where you are and we're hanging onto any sliver of hope that we find. You will always have support and be supported here. Your Endo family has you 💛🥄💛
1. Katrina Martin Member
 
 <inline-mention username="whatwouldleiado" user-id="2053013"/> I'm so glad to hear that you find this a safe space to vent and talk and find support! We appreciate you and your support of other warriors as well. ~Katrina, <a href='https://endometriosis.net' target='_blank'>Endometriosis.net</a> Advocate
2. Kimberli Davino Member
 
 <inline-mention username="whatwouldleiado" user-id="2053013"/> that makes our heart so happy to hear. Like Katrina said, we appreciate YOU warrior. This will always be a safe space to vent, share, talk and find support 🖤Hope you have a beautiful week ahead. -Kimberli (team member)
Katrina Martin Member

@Gabs we are all here for you. As others have said, you are not alone, but I certainly relate to the feeling. I often feel alone and I have struggled with depression since I was a teen. I've had four surgeries and potentially need a fifth. It can feel like things get a little better only to get worse again and it is incredibly frustrating. I hope your upcoming surgery is exactly what you need and that it will be your last. I'll be thinking good thoughts for you! ~Katrina, <a href='https://endometriosis.net' target='_blank'>Endometriosis.net</a> Advocate
Kimberli Davino Member

<inline-mention username="Gabs" user-id="4590574"/> - I just wanted to stop by and see how you are doing <3 Please, never hesitate to reach out to us if you ever need to chat. Sending gentle hugs and good thoughts. -Kimberli (team member)
alexN0076 Member

I am so sorry that you have to go through this. I totally feel your pain. I have only had 1 surgery so far but only after a year it looks like I might need another one. Having reoccurring pains again that are pretty debilitating. Hang in there and don't stop fighting! I have been racking my brain researching potential causes of endo and other ways to minimize the pain for now. I wish there was a cure! I am here if you need to chat. 
1. Kimberli Davino Member
 
 <inline-mention username="alexN0076" user-id="4167491"/> we are so sorry you have to go through this as well and that your pains are back 🙁 But look at you, being here for our community members and rooting them on. YOU are a warrior. Thank you for being a part of this community. We hope you remember to hang in there and to not stop fighting, too! You may have read these already but here are some articles that may be helpful to read! https://endometriosis.net/cause https://endometriosis.net/statistics https://endometriosis.net/living/pain-management https://endometriosis.net/living/pain-management-specialist We so wish there was a cure, too. Please know, we are always here for you. So reach out anytime you need us. Hoping you are able to find some relief and minimize that pain you are experiencing again, soon. Have you talked to your doctor yet about it? -Kimberli (team member)
Kimberli Davino Member

<inline-mention username="Gabs" user-id="4590574"/> - just wanted to swing by and see how you are doing! Hoping you are having a good, pain free week <3 -Kimberli (team member)
Harlee Member

Never give up, please keep searching for a doctor that will help you beyond expectations. I went through 5 OBGYNs until I found one that would actually listen to me. You will find light at the end of the tunnel, God carry’s us through and share your story with as many people as you can. You’ll be surprised at how many women say they’ve had or have it knows someone who’s dealing with endo. You got this and you can do it ❤️ Harlee
Laken Brooks Member

<inline-mention username="Gabs" user-id="4590574"/> I know it's been a while since you posted this story, but I wanted to thank you SO MUCH for sharing. Your pain and your thoughts are 10000000% valid. I am sorry you've had to go through this. I wanted to reach out to see how you're doing now. How are you holding up? Sending you hugs! - Laken