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How to Handle Allergies at a Dinner Party

Dietary restrictions can create a host of challenges. But when you’re home in your own kitchen, it’s a lot easier to control what makes its way onto your plate.

When you’re at a restaurant, you can review the menu in advance and even talk with the chef or manager. But when you’re invited to a dinner party at someone’s home, that’s where it can get tricky.

Approaching the dilemma

How do you honor your dietary restrictions, but at the same time accept the invitation to share a meal in someone’s home? As with many challenges in life, clear communication is key.

If I personally know the hostess of the dinner party, I will call her in advance thank her for the invitation and express my excitement to be part of it (I always fear that my dietary restrictions will stop future dinner invitations coming my way, so I make it a point to share how much the invitation means to me).

Then I’ll let her know that I have some dietary restrictions – I don’t explain why or try to justify them – and ask if I can bring a dish that would be allergy-friendly. I’m happy to coordinate a dish with her menu and bring enough for everyone. This starts the conversation without any extra pressure or burden on the hostess.

My experiences

Many times, they will share the menu and even offer to set a side of plain grilled chicken or whatever they’re having before it’s marinated in things I likely can’t have. I do try to accept that offer because many hosts really do want to personally feed their guests well – that’s a joy for them.

If I don’t know the host well, I will often have a big lunch that day, have something small at dinner that I know is allergy-friendly, and then have a plan for the ride home if I’m still hungry.

Most times, it’s a nonissue and the dinner is seamless. On rare occasions, the hostess may unnecessarily make a big deal about it, but that is out of my control and at its core really has little to do with me. There is nothing unreasonable about taking care of my body.

How have you handled dietary restrictions at dinner parties before? If you have additional tips, please share below!

Some meal ideas

And to help get your culinary juices flowing here are some examples of dishes that you could offer to bring to a dinner party – depending upon your restrictions, of course. These shouldn’t take away from the hostess’ menu, but are also substantial enough that they could serve as a meal.

  • Big salad (you could make this your main dish)
  • Roasted veggies and hummus, basil white bean dip or spread of your choice
  • Quinoa and cranberry salad
  • Gluten free pasta dish (seasoned Italian, Chinese or tai style)
  • Chickpea, lentil, or bean dish
  • Seasonal soup (most hosts love this because it adds another course to their menu!)
  • Roasted eggplant dish

Any other suggestions? As always, please share below!

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